Thank you, Yahoo! Shine for posting an article about the “10 Things You Shouldn’t Say to Singles.” I’ve seen these articles about the things you shouldn’t say to a bride, pregnant woman or mom, so it was refreshing to see an article that acknowledges the dumb things that people say to singles. Whether someone’s been married for 30 years or three months, I feel like they’re prone to “married person amnesia” that makes them forget about what it was truly like to be single.

I’ve noticed that as I get closer to 30, there’s a lot more unsolicited advice and questioning about my marital status (or lack thereof), so it’s good to know that I’m not the only one who hates hearing these things. Here are some of the things that especially irk me:

1. “Why aren’t you married?”
I get this one a lot. Whether it’s from a family member or a stranger, I stumble over what to say. “Guess it’s not my time yet” is what normally comes out, but “none of your freakin’ business” is what I’m really thinking.

2. “Have you tried online dating?”
This one is especially bad when it comes from the over 50 crowd that’s been married since high school. Online dating looks awesome in commercials. But it was a sad, yet hilarious, experience for me that didn’t yield any dates. It’s great that it worked for your co-worker, niece, sister, cousin, etc., but I’m not doing it again anytime soon.

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Do Manners Still Matter?

December 7, 2011 in Etiquette

I fell in love with the importance of etiquette when I went to cotillion in middle school.  Small things like the proper way to wear a name tag or the order of how to use silverware in a fancy place setting have stuck with me and still come in handy.  When people don’t write thank you notes for gifts I’ve sent them or do other downright rude things, I wonder if manners still matter.  I really like to think that they do and that they make a difference in our friendships, careers and in other areas of life.

Yesterday I went to an event hosted by Gilt City Atlanta to pick up Emily Post’s Etiquette: 18th Edition – Manners for a New WorldPeggy Post, Emily Post’s great-granddaughter-in-law briefly spoke about how kindness and good manners are still in high demand today.   Etiquette is less about formalities than it is about ways we can be courteous to others.

I just started reading the 736 page tome, but here are some things that I’ve learned so far that may come in handy for other single gals:

  • One of my personal pet peeves is being addressed as “Miss” instead of “Ms.”  I asked Peggy Post about this during the Q&A and learned that “Miss” is antiquated and should only be used until age 16 to 18 for women who have never been married.
  • With Christmas right around the corner, know that you should write thank you notes for holiday gifts as soon as possible.  It’s recommended to say “thank you” for Christmas gifts before the start of the New Year.
  • The book has a great section on dating etiquette.  Going on a first date?  You’ll want to avoid talking about your income (or asking about his), your previous relationships or gossiping about mutual friends.
  • Good news for bridesmaids: you don’t technically have to host a bridal shower or bachelorette party.  Bridesmaid duties include paying for your dress and accessories, arranging transportation, buying a wedding gift and attending pre-wedding events, but splitting the cost of a shower isn’t a requirement.  It’s a nice gesture, but the expenses related to other bridesmaid responsibilities makes it okay to admit that you can’t afford to throw a fancy event for the bride.

Do manners still matter to you?

Note: This wasn’t a sponsored post.  I just really love learning about etiquette.


You Want ME to Help Pay for YOUR Wedding?

March 16, 2011

Let’s say you have a friend who got engaged.  You’re excited for them and their wedding planning and then you see that they posted this on Facebook (wording slightly changed to protect the identity of the poster): It’s been a year since we got engaged and we have finally chosen a date for the wedding!  […]

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